A Spoonful of Salt

A Spoonful of Salt
Please take everything you read with a grain of salt. But for this blog, please take it with a spoonful.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Art or Junk?

You think those are butterflies? Look closer.

"The Holy Virgin Mary" Chris Ofili (1996)

Here is another example of why you should NOT act on every idea that pops into your head. Nobody wants to see you naked in the name of art, lady! P.S. Okay, I admit, you have a decent body, but your tramp stamp is not pretty...yet it is the only thing artistic about your photo.

It has been my experience as an observer that artists tend to think every idea they have is brilliant, magical and will have a huge impact on every person who views their artwork. In reality, their work is typically is only brilliant, magical to the artist and only understood by the artist themselves.

For example, Janine Antoni's "Gnaw" (1992). She thinks it is so cool to use her body in her artwork. In the past, she has dipped her hair in paint and painted a canvas on the floor by flinging her hair around, had herself dipped into a pool of lard, made soap and chocolate moldings of her face, etc. In "Gnaw", she used the act of chewing and spitting lard (yes, I said LARD!) and chocolate into buckets and had them molded into 600lb blocks. Then, she took bites out of the blocks and had lipstick and a box for chocolates (empty of chocolates but made of chocolate) made with that saliva/lard or saliva/chocolate mixture of those bites. BRAVO! What an incredible concept! Lets give this woman some awards to legitimize this foolishness!

Actually, shame on her for wasting all that food. There are still starving kids in (insert any third world country here), you know!

I don't know, maybe I just don't GET modern art. But I think a prerequisite to being an artist must be to have a drug problem and/or a mental illness of some sort and/or to be totally self-absorbed...like this guy, or this guy, or even this guy.

None of these people are sane. So, why do we as a society look at their work in awe and think they are masterpieces? These are just crazy/self-loving people with too much time on their hands than make crazy art with cryptic meanings. Or maybe I am the crazy one for taking my time to write about them...hmm.

Speaking of crazy, I recently read this article and really got a kick out of it. One in three Art students can't tell famous paintings from paintings by monkeys. And these are future artists. Enough said!

Happy Monday!


Monday, March 21, 2011

Meth Lab Daycare and Sumo Runner

Ooopsies! I have been forgetting to blog. I was just having TOO much fun on Spring Break last week!

So, this is old new but still worth sharing. This is deplorable...and apparently it is becoming the newest way for people to legitimately run a business (without a license, that is) and smoke dope all day as well! Who said you can't have your cake and eat it too?! I kid.

In other happier news, congrats to this guy! While I would not want to be in the news as being the heaviest person to complete ANYTHING, kudos to him for having the strength to carry his 400 pound body 26 miles down the road. It is commendable that he is still able to walk, much less run a marathon. It is certainly not something I could do, and I am not morbidly obese...yet.

Happy Monday to you all! I promise I will be a more diligent blogger. I know you look forward to reading my personal thoughts on random news stories...pause...not!


Thursday, March 10, 2011

A Hair-Razing Ordeal

This just made my day! Here are just a few alternate headlines for this story even though the picture itself is funny enough:

1. Man Makes Fun of Bad Haircut, Gets Cut

2. The Victim of Bad Haircut Is Perpetrator of Crime

3. Pro-Cuts Had a Half-off Sale

4. Now Trending: The HALF-fro

5. Stab and A Haircut, Two Bits!

6. "Barbershop 3: I'll Cut Ya" Coming Soon

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

A Boatload of "Buttload"

This is nonsensical! I cannot believe that the general public is so dumb that the dictionary will now include words such as "buttload." Everyone knows "buttload" is a word which derived from the word "boatload" being mispronounced. It is just sad that as a result of it being mispronounced so frequently, they just decided, what the hey, let's go ahead and make the mispronounced, made up word a legitimate word! If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right?

Wrong. With that attitude, by 2012, schools in the U.S. will be teaching textspeak and/or Ebonics instead of English.

As a matter of fact, I don't particularly care for any of the words on the list. The only one that I think is remotely clever is "sexting," which actually is not anything to write home to Mom about either since it is just two words combined into one. The rest on the list just make me embarrassed to be living on this planet. Once Mars is livable for humans, I will be moving there. Heck, I may even write my own dictionary for my new planet! You can be certain, it will NOT include the word "buttload," which I am still not accepting as a REAL word.